Hollywood Headliners

-The CW has cancelled Veronica Mars. Wait, what? One less drama about teen angst? What am I going to do with myself?

-Paris Hilton's jail sentence was reduced from 45 to 23 days. Some call it time off for good behavior, I call it a good lawyer. It was also reported that she will be in a section of the facility which holds high profile prisoners, such as former police officers or others who could be threatened by the general inmate population. Um, but can't the general inmate population be threatened by the general inmate population. I don't get it. I mean I get it, but I don't get it. And Paris will likely have an inmate. What I wouldn't give to be a fly on that wall for 23 days. To hear someone try to bond with Paris and understand what goes on in that head of hers. Maybe they could do a reality show where they show what she does in prison. That ought to make some bucks for the CW.

-La Lohan. It wouldn't be a Hollywood Headliner update without some trashy story about Lindsay. Not only has she been seen sucking...face that is, with new British boy-toy Callum Best (eh, she's done worse, that's for sure. But I'm sure he's done better!), she was also just saved from a theft charge where a woman claimed Lindsay stole clothing from her while she was out of town. Things are looking up for Lindsay. Now stop going out every night, and ditch that bottle of 'water' that is apparently glued to your palm and you'll be all set!

-On the American Idol front, Melinda Dolittle is relieved she was cut from the competition. She claims it was the first time she was able to exhale in a long time. Hopefully she realizes that the show was just a launching pad for her career! Also, Phil Stacey has been granted time off from serving in the Marines to tour the country with American Idols, Live! In an interview, a spokesperson for the Marines spoke very highly of Stacey, thanking him for his dedication to his country. Sounds like he's quite a valuable asset. So valuable in fact, that the Marines let him take 5 months off to appear on the show, and another 4 months for the tour. So what if a few marines have to eat unpeeled potatoes for a few months (not sure what other valuable service he could be lending to them). They love Phil Stacey!

-People.com reported that Jessica Simpson and John Mayer have split. Not for good, though, but temporarily. A source on Team Simpson says, "They have broken up. But they have broken up and gotten back together at least ten times before. I'm sure they'll get back together." And a source on Team Mayer says, "John did say that he broke up [with Jessica]. He said that it was because he was just over it." Wow. I know these two are young and have been in the spotlight for a while, and thus they may have missed out on a few years of being a normal person, but have you ever heard lamer teen drama than this???